I HAVE been meeting my best mate?s sister for amazing, crazy sex and lying to my girlfriend about where I have been. I feel awful for hurting her as she has been wonderful to me but I can?t help myself.
I am 24, my girlfriend is 23 and we have been together for three years. I was something of a wild child when we first met and I had huge problems. She stood by me every step of the way through some of the toughest times in my life. She helped me to turn my life around.
I met my mate?s sister at his brother?s wedding where I was invited to help out. I found her attractive right away. I realised at once it was mutual and we flirted all evening. We exchanged phone numbers and became good friends.
Then we met up again by chance in a pub. She looked stunning and I went straight over to her. At the end of the night we shared a kiss and then went to a hotel and booked a room.
We had absolutely amazing sex. I had no idea women could go crazy like that. She exhausted me and still wanted more.
I often sleep at a mate?s flat after a night out as it is easier and cheaper than getting a cab home, so my girlfriend did not find it unusual that I wasn?t back until the next afternoon.
The truth was we spent all day in bed in the hotel with the ?Do not disturb? notice on the door.
My new girl and I have been meeting regularly since, sometimes for sex and sometimes for proper dates. We even went on a weekend away together - I told my girlfriend it was a business trip.
Now this girl has told me she loves me and I know I feel the same way. She says she is willing to wait for me to finish with my girlfriend and knows it will take time.
I want to be with her more than anything but I cannot bear to hurt my girlfriend as she has been wonderful to me. I dread to think where I would have ended up if it was not for her.
I don?t want to hurt either of them.
DEIDRE SAYS
You cannot live your whole life a lie so it is inevitable that you will hurt the girlfriend who has been so good to you sooner or later. Sooner probably means less pain for her.
Sometimes relationships are based on one person?s need and the other person fulfilling that need.
Your girlfriend was there when you badly needed someone to help you through. Now you are back on your feet and do not have the same problems. You are no longer a ?wild child? and you feel ready to move on. Nothing is quite the same and you long to be free.
Be sure to tell your girlfriend how special she is and how much she changed your life but say that your feelings have changed because you have changed. You owe it to her to be honest with her.
My free leaflet on how to end a relationship will help you to find the words and prevent her from finding out the hard way that you have been cheating and lying to her. That would hurt her more than anything.
Ask the new girl to give you time to sort your life out and get back with her later. Don?t cheat. Wait until you are free.
Can it work if you stay with a partner just out of guilt? Tell me on my Facebook page today.
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